My no looking back song

I have been in hibernating mode for the past weeks.

I kept quiet and chose to disconnect myself. I closed my facebook account, and I overcame the habbit of automatically typing the facebook address everytime I open a webpage.

I decided to shut down myself from people close to me because I fear that if I connect with them, I might spread the negativity I have with me now.

Last January, I booked tickets for a short holiday in Bali which is supposedly for this week.

I was looking forward to this trip for me to re energize and unwind.

The past few months has been very difficult for me. Each day I battle of the thought of living abroad again against staying in the comforts of home with the security of being with family.

For some, it might sound crazy risking myself living on the edge with uncertainties abroad while I do have a secured place called home. But digging deeper, I realized its not about having a secured future and making sure that I am living comfortably when my senior years arrive. It's about making the most of my my fading youth , and living life doing the things that makes one happy. Bottom line, I would want that during my golden years, I would have bunch of stories to tell; and I would want to end it saying, "it was tough, it was never easy, but it was fun and not a single moment I regret".

Right now the battle and struggles continues day after day. I get upset thinking about it. But I remembered the time when I took a risk of quiting my office job for an unknown adventure in china. While preparing for my trip to china, I felt a lot of uncertainties and anxieties. But despite that, I promised myself that the moment I step out the plane and arrive in Shanghai I would listen to this song to welcome myself to my new adventure. And it actually felt good walking to the chinese immigration while listening to my song.

For now, plans are still uncertain. But I already have a song in mind that I would be listening when I set foot again for my planned adventure. But its different this time. I have learned my lessons from home thus I wanna call this "my no looking back" song .

Promise... I will do better

This is for now.... But Promise. I will do better

Create your own travel map or travel blog

Top vacation rentals at TripAdvisor

How I see my future

It has been a tough week since I got back from my holiday. Everyday seems to be a struggle to get up. I had been wanting to get back to running just to shake everything off. It has been raining and it is impossible to get out and run.

I don't want to sound negative but everything at work is just black now. I am starting to question myself if I made the right decision of leaving my life abroad. Turning back on my independence and freedom in exchange to the life I am living now with my family.

I honestly don't want to think that I made the wrong move. The decision of coming back home was a move that I thought over and over. But in this negative situation, I cannot help but ask myself of the things that matter and how I see my future with regards to how I am working to achieve that future that I long for.

After job hopping and some traveling, I have come to realize that I don't want to be rich and live in an expensive lifestyle. I just want a comfortable laid back and secure future.

For now, I wanted my future to be related to traveling. And to realize this, I want to open a guest house or a hostel in a foreign land where backpackers often visit.

This is not so much of an income generating business but meeting people and exchanging travel stories is one thing that I enjoy most.

Running a hostel does not require high maintenance compared to running a hotel.

I once stayed in a hostel in Seoul where the owners clean the house themselves and leaves the house in the evening, meaning only guest remains in the house during night time. They just leave a note and number to call incase of emergency.

The couple treat everyone as family. People just come and go in the hostel.

(common living room of stay korea in Seoul)

(one of the hippest hostels i have stayed)

Ideally, aside from running a hostel in a far away country, I would like to be a part time college professor. Running the hostel in the mornings and do teaching in the evenings. I would like to teach a business related subject in the University. I have not tried formal teaching, but I have a strong feeling that teaching in the University is something that I would enjoy doing.

Now coming back to reality, None of the present things I am doing can lead me to achieve this goal for the future. That is why I am burned out easily.

To my friends who reads this blog, kindly get in touch with me and tell me what you think about how I see my future. Do you think it fits me? I need your thoughts

East Africa

A small presentation to sum it all up

East africa Slideshow: JP’s trip from Manila to 6 cities Nairobi, Kampala, Kigali, Kisumu, Nakuru and Narok was created by TripAdvisor. See another Kenya slideshow. Take your travel photos and make a slideshow for free.

I am not a bag

It's a rainy wednesday afternoon. I took a break from work and opened my facebook account. At the home screen, I saw that my sister was tagged in an album.

Note: Once you are tagged in a photo, when people look at your pictures, the photo that you were tagged will appear in your "photos" .

I scanned through the albums, and there wasn't a single photo of her. It was an album of signature branded bags for sale.

Looking at it, It got me into thinking the reasons why we create our facebook profile and how it became a universal website (except in china, where facebook is banned).

Facebook is use to connect with other people.

Facebook is to tell other people of what is happening with our lives now

Facebook is boast to other people of our latest travel pics, to boast to other people of pictures that we look good in. ( most of us even have different albums to arrange our photos).

Now as I scanned through the album where my sister was tagged into. It was purely 127 pictures of different overpriced bags.

When I checked into my sister's profile page, It says that she has 200 photos. When I clicked the photos, they were different photo collections of travel pictures, family pictures and some beach pictures. Since she was tagged in an album full of bags, there were at least 13 pictures of different bags included in her photos.

I wondered if she is okay that she became an overpriced ordinary looking bag in 13 pictures in her profile.

What's worse is that because of a lot of fake designer bags being sold. These albums want to make sure that their bags are "authentic" they also post pictures of the receipts and some helpful logos to attest to the bag's "authenticity".

Now check your profile pictures, you might be a designer bag now, or maybe a korean fashion dress!!!

Just thinking aloud

(This is my sister, turned into Ferragamo)

(she is not fake. Check the logo)

(still not convinced? she was bought in a ferragamo store. look at her receipts)

It's sunday and It's Complicated

It's sunday.

The first Sunday I challenged myself to update more often.

Nothing much really happened this week. Though there were occasional mood highs and lows during the week, but nothing really significant worth noting down.

Right now, I am just trying my best to let the feeling of excitement of going to Africa sink into me. Last night I printed my Tickets and Visas just to let it all in, but it didn't really do much.

Today I booked my accommodation for my first night in Kenya. ( I normally just book an overnight accommodation and feel the place and see things from there.)

For this trip, I am planning to try some homestays, wherein in locals would open their house for travelers to stay for a minimal fee. I got an account via www.homestayweb.com for me to contact families willing to accept me in their house. This for me is a good way to experience the local's culture and way of life.

After I paid for my accommodation I got a confirmation email and a follow thru mail offering for an airport pick up.

Hi JP

Thank you for booking accommodation with us. Your reservation for a double garden tent, arriving on SATURDAY, 3 JULY, for 1 night has been confirmed.

If you would like to book an airport pick to bring you to our camp, this will cost 1,700 Kenya Shillings (for a saloon car) from the International Airport . To arrange this all we need is your flight details (flight arrival time and number). If you plan to make your own way to our camp, please advise of your arrival time, as all rooms, even if previously confirmed or paid for in full, will only be held until 16:00 hours. If your plans change, and you no longer require this reservation, please let us know via the contact details below.

Dinner is served (buffet style) at the camp at 19:00 each evening. If you would like dinner, please advise in advance. For guests arriving in Nairobi after 20:00, it can be difficult to buy meals, even takeaway, so it is good to plan in advance if you think you might like something to eat on arrival.

Accommodation, camp, and travel services can be paid for with cash (Kenyan Shillings, Euro, British Pounds, US Dollars), credit or debit card (visa and mastercard only), or bank transfer prior to arrival. If you plan to use your credit or debit card here in Africa , don’t forget to advise your bank before you leave home. If you are bringing US Dollars, ensure that the ‘series date’ printed on them is 2000 or newer (notes printed in the 1990s are not accepted in East Africa – even by banks).

We have a travel office at the camp which can assist with booking day tours, safaris, trekking, beach accommodation, bus and train tickets and much more. Please visit our website below or email us for further details.

Thank you again for your booking and we look forward to welcoming you to Wildebeest Camp.

Kind regards
Daniel

I am not so keen on getting picked up in the airport. For one, I am not comfortable of someone waiting for me specially if there are flight delays. Secondly, 1,700 kenya shillings is too much! The site says that they are located about 2 km from the airport, and there are reviews saying that the camp's airport pick up is a ripped off money! With this, I am going to brace myself with my bargaining skills to take a cab to bring me to the camp, anyway I am expecting to arrive at 2:24 in the afternoon.

I want to share some photos of the camp I will be staying, which I got from www.hostelbookers.com

(Indoor accommodations are inside the house)

(outdoor accommodations which I will be staying by the garden)

With that, I am starting to feel the excitement build up now!

It's complicated

This morning I got hold of a movie titled It's complicated.

It is an entertaining film. More of a mature sex and the city style. A break also from the usual teens to 20's 30's cast in a romantic comedy which is we commonly see in the movies.

The story tackles 50 year old divorcee Jane and how the romance with his husband rekindled after being separated for 10 years.

I got the notion that hot steamy sex are just good on the first few years of being married. But this story got me to thinking. Does sex actually still exist at 50?

A funny scene was when the divorced couple had sex for the first time after 10 years. After they orgasm, the panting husband touched the groin of the wife, who was also still catching her breath saying " home sweet home!"

Here is the link to the official trailer of the movie

Have a good week ahead

Need to write more

This is it.

I am challenging myself to write more.

I will try to set a day, or every sunday of the week to update this blog. Be it something new that I experienced during the week or something that would just spark an interest in me.

Let me share an interesting email I got a few weeks back.

Here goes:

Dear Jp,

I am the Dallas artist who about a year ago contacted you for permission to paint from your photos. I finally got around to posting some paintings on my Facebook page. You can see it in my "Painterly Musings" album. I hope you like it. It is hanging in a Dallas gallery I co-own! I get many nice comments on it, too. I used to do portraits in oils about 25 yrs. ago and this is the first watercolor portrait I've attempted and I hope to do more.

Thank you for allowing me to be inspired by your talents! I also hope you pursue your gifts. You have such sensitivity in your photography!

Sincerely,
Marianne Phelps

(unedited photo taken 2009)

(painting inspired from photo above)

I hope she did justice to my picture. You guys be the judge.

I have added a small feature on this blog called "fishes" . Please take time to feed the fishes, specially the black one. That is ME.