Much needed travel.... Follow up

Ey, i just got a message from my Mom. She was asking where I was and told me why I haven't been on the internet lately.
I actually did not tell them that somebody broke into my apartment because I would know that they would be freaking out and would insist I better go home at once. I just made up and said that my computer was destroyed because it got wet while I was walking in the rain.

So I decided to call her and update her. ( See it is so difficult without the computer)

Me: Hello Mom
Mom: Oh hello! where are you now? How come you were not online for a long time ( surprised!)
Me: I am in China.
Mom: So you are back from India?
Me: No, I am leaving this thursday.
Mom: I thought you left already you have bot been online for a long time, we thought you were
already in India.
Me: Nope. I am still here. I told you my computer is destroyed and I cant afford to buy a new
one now since I will use my savings for my trip.
Mom:Oh okay, just let us know where you are so we will know where to find you.
Me: Ok Mom. How's dad?
Mom: He is fine, He is here now. So when are you coming back here?
Me: I don't have the exact date yet, but from India I will go back to China then head home.
Mom: Oh ok. Just be careful and take care.
Me: Alright. Don't worry. I will. ( I gave her my flight details and the time difference from India
and home)
Mom: How many days will you stay in India?
Me: Uhhm, I still don't know, it depends. (I was caught off guard because it would be ridiculous to tell her I am travelling to India for a month. Yes, it is very unlikely from people in my family to travel for a long time).
Mom: Ok just don't forget to call us from time to time.

Yes my friends, I am a good liar. I don't know how my family would react when they would know that I will be travelling for a long time.

Goodluck!

Much needed travel

I have decided to put an end to being gloomy and on the down side. Lately my days here in China has been nothing but depressing. I go out of my apartment in the morning and go back to my apartment in the evening. Honestly, I am starting to feel very lonely living alone. I have not bought a new computer because of budget constraints. Now I have realized how dependent I am with the internet. I read blogs, news and listen to music and communicate with friends and family back home through the internet. I don't blame myself for being hooked on the internet, it is my source of information and keep me company in a foreign land.

Tonight is my last night in my apartment. This is also another issue, after somebody broke into my apartment and stole my computer, I certainly don't feel safe anymore. I have a current issue with my landlady who is making it very hard for me to get my money back( I have paid for the whole term of my stay here and a month's deposit). It's just so hard for her to return back my money, and always insisting that her apartment is safe and she won't give me back my money since i broke our contract.
She is making it more difficult for me.

Tomorrow I will go to shanghai and get my Indian Visa and I will leave for Mumbai the next day. I booked for Shanghai-Mumbai Feb. 26 and return to china via Delhi to Shanghai on Mar. 24. The whole trip would cover almost a month. I haven't planned anything yet nor have I booked any place to stay. I just read some facts about India and how to get around the whole country by land.

I will try my best to forget about China while I will be there. I have also looked into volunteering to some orphanages in India just to keep me back to on track.

While I was walking today to China post to send some of my things back home. I just realized I need to breath another air. I need to be out of China for a while to appreciate all the things and all the people here. I just need to be in a new environment and a new place that speaks another language and practice a different culture.


I really hope that this much needed travel would bring me back to my old self and appreciate the things that I have rather than linger over spilled milk ( this is from a chinese friend Huangran)

Finishing this entry, I am trying to smile and tell myself: INDIA here I come =)

staring into space song

I am leaving China soon. I will be going to India next week. I am normally excited to travel. But something just doesn't feel right, I am not so excited to travel this time. I feel like I am travelling just because I need to prove something to nobody.
I am hoping for my blues to go away soon, It's been with me for so long already.
I wanna share with you a song that I would love to listen and would just make me stare into space and hoping to clear my mind.

Please click on the link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWr_LAiOhAA&feature=related

enjoy it my friends...Join with me in staring into space and clear our minds

rainmaker

Can't think straight

I tried my best to pick up the broken pieces in my life right now. I have a few days left in China and I don't know what's in store for me on the next months or even years to come.
I am suspended in the air. I am drowning and I allowed myself to wallow and drown.
I can't even think straight.

I'm always not in the mood to write. I did some walking hoping it would clear my thoughts. Everytime I am back in my apartment, I drowning again. My apartment is one place that I don't want to be in right now.
I am trying to uplift myself by planning a trip abroad before going home, but nothing seems to be working for me.

I am sorry for ranting....I am having a hard time collecting my thoughts while writing. I can't think straight

Im picking up pieces now

I am picking up pieces now....
Pieces that I left behind, going back to pace where I started. Doing the things I used to do. catching up on my reading, listening to my music, sleeping on my side of the bed, eating the food I am used to eat, sleeping at my convenient time, waking up when I want to, watching my movies, writing my thoughts, catching up on all the things I need to do before I left it hanging.

I am picking up pieces now. It's been few hours since I started picking up my pieces.
A few more hours or maybe days and I will be back on track, but now....I am still picking up pieces. I am picking up pieces slowly to be able to move forward soon.


Song while I am picking up my pieces:
Warning Sign--Cold play

It hurts... But I know what won't kill me will only make me stronger.